The road to finding great bandmates can be long and tiring.
With inevitably lots of turnover, trial and error, and silly
disagreements, you'll eventually find the right talent for
the job. But know that not only is your struggle real, it's
also hilarious, as we all seem to meet the same types of musicians
on this journey to finding the perfect bandmates.
1. The bragger
This is the guy who will not stop name
and venue dropping, who cannot just shut the hell up. Stop
the one-upping and play the damn song!
2. The master of unprepardness
No, it doesn't matter how many times
you've sent out the set list, how many YouTube links came
with it, or the lead sheet you may have even slaved over all
night... they did not read it, they did not look at it, and
they are always winging it. WTF!
3. The chronic double-booker
Bless his soul, but the guy can just
not figure it out! Rehearsal is at 7:00 p.m. That does not
mean show up at 8:10 p.m. talking about work/traffic/your
dog escaping/the line at Dunkin'/forgetting your equipment.
Figure it the hell out!
4. The over-player
Equal parts hilarious and annoying, this
guy just can't play the freakin' part. Stop embellishing,
dammit! You're a great player. We know this. It's why you're
here. But for God's sake, will you just play what's written?!
Just this once? We are in my basement, not Madison Square
Garden, but I appreciate your chutzpah!
5. The lone rider
Alright, we've all run into this guy.
Answers the post, comes prepared, pretty decent... but weird.
Nothing but awkward social interactions, forced small talk,
and a generally uncomfortable conversation every. single.
time. But he plays okay and shows up... so that was the job
description, right? Wrong! He is just too weird!
6. The diva
These are the people with a mind-blowing
sense of entitlement. Maybe they went to a top-notch music
school? Maybe they've shared the stage with someone important?
Or maybe, just maybe, their mommy told them they were a special
snowflake one too many times. We pray for you, Diva Musicians.
7. The perfectionist
Bless your soul for having perfect pitch
but dammit, do you ever stop correcting people?! Yes, we all
don't play perfectly every time. And you can bet your sweet
behind that I'm fully aware that I played the wrong note,
but thank you so much for the confirmation. No, I do not want
to practice this song for a sixth time in a row. Yes, I am
getting irritable. And yes, I will talk crap about you over
a beer with the drummer after practice. Good day, sir!